A Reply to a Focused Blog…

Focus… focus…


It’s official – I am making myself crazy with procrastination, and having so many things hanging over my head.


Good news, though — on Sunday, I finally tackled four very important pieces of federal and state gov’t paperwork that I need to get on with my life. I had been putting them off for weeks, and I finally got myself to just sit down with it on Sunday morning, spend the day working through it — reading and reading and re-reading everything till my eyes were crossed — and then filling out the forms, making the copies, and mailing them out on Monday morning with the proper certifications.


I was absolutely euphoric on Sunday. It felt so good to get it all done. I was a little down on myself for not doing it all right away several weeks ago, but when I thought about it, I realized the timing was perfect, and there was no fault, no blame. AND I finished it prior to my 2-month deadline (in July), so that is big progress for me.


In the past, I would have waited till July, then rushed at the end, and possibly made a mistake that could have cost me big.


I am having some important phone calls with people this week about next steps, and where I used to dread and fear those calls, I am looking forward to them now. Because I know how to use my tools, and I have some good successes behind me in communicating and getting my point across.


It’s very exciting. And even though I am wiped out (I got about 5-1/2 hours of sleep last night), I am feeling really relaxed. I know I’m not as sharp as I could be, but I am making progress, and that’s what counts.


Our love
03/2012 – Dad loves Daughter and Daughter loves Dad

My reply:

It sounds as though you’re talking about the social security department; am I right?  The thing that tipped me off was the two month

Stephanie learning how to smile (something I never mastered)
Stephanie learning how to smile (something I never mastered)

deadline.  I too, felt a sense of euphoria when I completed my SSDI paperwork well before the two month deadline.  However, it wasn’t long (third of the month) until that euphoria had turned into a four months of hell.

The S.S Administration saw fit not to honor my request in writing to cancel my Medicare part B saying that, “You had better not cancel because Obama care will soon be in effect and there will be a mandate with it that says every person in the U.S. must have healthcare or be fined.  If you stop your Medicare now, it will cost you more if you sign up for it again.  I don’t think you want to do this…”

Since when has it been okay for somebody, (a government employee) who is completely ignorant of my situation, to think of what I do  and don’t want to do.  She had the letter so all she had to do was honor my request instead of thinking.  Her thinking cost me, $400 off of my already paltry income.  I am disabled and nobody will hire me because of thinking too slow, dexterity issues, mobility issues or my dysarthria and aphasia.
Our little townhouse that I rent for my daughter and I is always clean, but that cleanliness was  too much for the property manager where I live and she told me, “You are anal about cleaning your place.”

She said that when I asked her about replacing the carpet which needed replacement when I rented the place seven years ago.    It was rented with nasty carpet and knife slit kitchen vinyl because I was in dire need of a place for us to live; it was unbearable living with her mother any longer.

My mind was wandering from one bad hing to another…and so it goes.

2012 - Just before her dance performance.
2012 – Just before her dance performance.


One thought on “A Reply to a Focused Blog…

  1. There are times when procrastination is much harder than doing the actual job or duty. Take for example writing. When I am in a funk of sorts I cannot think of anything to write about so I end up writing nonsense trying to get onto something meaningful, and so it goes..


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